Galactic Imperium News Service: Breaking News! The U.S. Department of Thought Crime recently issued the above graphic to help citizens identify hidden Russian operatives that may have infiltrated their home, schools, churches and more.
Says Special Director Dr. J. Muta Falsus, head of Operations at the U.S. Department of Thought Crime, “We understand that our beloved and exceedingly trustworthy Centralized Press has uncovered many secret Russian activities that are attempting to undermine years of Leftist Progressivism and Statism in our wondrous nation. As such, we believed it was appropriate to come out with the above poster to help re-invigorate Cold War era sentiments and military industrial complex cashflows.”
The chart helpfully asks a number of questions to reveal potential traitors – and additionally points out how Russians were responsible for the first American Civil War, how bedbugs are actually secret Russian nano-spy devices, how Thomas Jefferson was actually a Kremlin puppet, how PewDiePie fans and NPC memes are Russian tools and how Russians have brainwashed many Americans to reject the truths of CNN and MSN.
The U.S. Department of Thought Crime recommends that the infographic poster be printed out in large format and displayed prominently in a public place.
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